My Distractions

A place for my stuff

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Once upon a time, there was a fetching young wolverine who, wearing her favorite red hood, went skipping through the fields, on the way to her grandmother’s house, carrying a basket of tasty goodies.*
A wolf, who was lurking at the edge of the woods, descended upon the young wolverine and said “Hello, little red riding wolverine, and where are you going in such a hurry?”
"To visit my grandmother," said the young wolverine, as demure and maidenly as a gravelly wolverine baritone can be.
"To visit your…to…grand…to..my goodness, what big teeth you have…" said the wolf, who seemed to have lost his train of thought somewhere.
The wolverine nodded.
"And what…big…claws…you have…" said the wolf, in much the same tone as General Custer commenting on the surprising number of locals at Little Bighorn.
The wolverine nodded.
"I’ll just bugger off, shall I?" said the wolf.
The wolverine nodded.
The wolf slunk gratefully back into the trees and hyperventilated quietly, and the little red riding wolverine skipped merrily through the woods to her grandmother’s house and they ate assorted rodents and watched cartoons and baked cookies happily ever after.  - Ursula Vernon
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*Pepperidge Farms’ Mixed Rodent Party Assortment, to be precise, a pretty good value for the money, although everybody always picks through and eats the gerbils first.

Once upon a time, there was a fetching young wolverine who, wearing her favorite red hood, went skipping through the fields, on the way to her grandmother’s house, carrying a basket of tasty goodies.*

A wolf, who was lurking at the edge of the woods, descended upon the young wolverine and said “Hello, little red riding wolverine, and where are you going in such a hurry?”

"To visit my grandmother," said the young wolverine, as demure and maidenly as a gravelly wolverine baritone can be.

"To visit your…to…grand…to..my goodness, what big teeth you have…" said the wolf, who seemed to have lost his train of thought somewhere.

The wolverine nodded.

"And what…big…claws…you have…" said the wolf, in much the same tone as General Custer commenting on the surprising number of locals at Little Bighorn.

The wolverine nodded.

"I’ll just bugger off, shall I?" said the wolf.

The wolverine nodded.

The wolf slunk gratefully back into the trees and hyperventilated quietly, and the little red riding wolverine skipped merrily through the woods to her grandmother’s house and they ate assorted rodents and watched cartoons and baked cookies happily ever after.  - Ursula Vernon

—————————

*Pepperidge Farms’ Mixed Rodent Party Assortment, to be precise, a pretty good value for the money, although everybody always picks through and eats the gerbils first.

(via nadesicokitty)

238,446 notes

loki-has-a-tardis:

This is honestly the best poster I have found in a while supporting breast cancer awareness. I am honestly so sick of seeing, “set the tatas free” and “save the boobies”. There is no reason in hell a life threatening, life ruining disease should be sexualized. “Don’t wear a bra day,” go fuck yourselves. You’re not saving a pair of tits, you’re saving the entire package: mind, body, and soul included. Women are not just a pair of breasts.

loki-has-a-tardis:

This is honestly the best poster I have found in a while supporting breast cancer awareness. I am honestly so sick of seeing, “set the tatas free” and “save the boobies”. There is no reason in hell a life threatening, life ruining disease should be sexualized. “Don’t wear a bra day,” go fuck yourselves. You’re not saving a pair of tits, you’re saving the entire package: mind, body, and soul included. Women are not just a pair of breasts.

(via oursisnottomakereply)